October!

I love October!  It's been a week of cooler temperatures... perfect for me.  I'm listening to Mahalia sing "I'm Gonna Live The Life I Sing About In My Song"...  Love it.  Makes me want to hug my Grandma... sending love heavenward... Yesterday would have been her and Grandpa's anniversary.  It is my uncle and aunt's, and my cousin's... Happy Anniversary to Burt and Pat, Kent and Robin... and also to another cousin, Elverta and Bud.  Celebrate your love!

My priorities have been to continue filling donation boxes and spending some quality time with my family.  There is a peace in my home that was missing for a while.  It came from my heart... battered, broken, frustrated, sad... the peace also comes from my heart.  There is a healing power when you give over everything, and just let God's peace cover you.   I miss my loved ones who are no longer with me.  Maybe that's weak.  Whatever... I will always miss them.  Sometimes tears will come.  It doesn't mean I don't know they are in a better place.  It means I wish I could pick up the phone and share a moment; I wish I could have one more hug; just one more shared laugh.  But, "It is well with my soul..." and I don't fear death... I did when I was a young woman, but that fell by the wayside on this journey of my life.

Autumn memories... beautiful, nostalgic, poignant... I feel them with every breath.  I love my life.  I love those who were, and who are, a part of it.

Blessings to you, my dear friends!
Nita Jo


copyright 10-08-10 ajj

There's Still Time

It's late and I should be sleeping, but my head is all tangled up with thoughts.  I am turning 54 later on this fall.  My life is more than half over, unless I live to be the very stately age of 108 or beyond.  This fact doesn't frighten me.  It does make me curious though... have I accomplished the life goals that are most important to me?  I've done the best I knew in raising my boys, and in dealing with family relationships and situations.  When I was able to work outside the home, I worked hard and I loved it.  I've served God as I understood serving.  I hope I have honored Him.  I am still a work in progress and continue to reach for higher knowledge in my spiritual life.

The areas I'm not content with are my life goals... being published, writing songs, creating art, being physically strong and active.  It seems there is never enough time in the day.  I have boxes of lovely crafty items and paints, etc.  I kept copies of articles I wrote for my church's newsletter for several years, because I had plans to compile them into a small book.  I have beginnings of four books... none close to being finished.  Rough drafts and incomplete short stories and poems.  I had songs... I tore up most and tossed them during the past ten years.  I am my own harshest critic.

What am I trying to say?  I don't have a clue!  I guess it's that more than half over, is not over!  There is still time!  I can't allow myself just to give in or to give up.  That's it!  I must keep reminding myself that my life is a journey.  Until it officially ends, I have no business living like it has ended.  God expects more of me than that.  I expect more of me than that too.  So, that being said, on with the living!




Copyright 09/29/10 ajj

Where Did Autumn Go?

Another day slated to be in the 90's... I miss the lovely autumn weather we were having.  It's too warm for me, but this is Idaho so I am confident that in a day or so we'll have another change.

I have rediscovered Maura O'Connell... such a beautiful singer.  I love the Irish folk music the most.  Folk music has a way of describing what's happening in the soul, singing of trouble without leaving you feeling down.  Songs of the people.  Telling tales of hardship and of overcoming.  Sometimes I feel my life is a folk song... trials come, sadness, but I am not one to be keep under the foot of trouble.   If you're under water... keep holding your breath, kicking your feet till you surface into the sunlight again.  Don't give in to the voice that says "just inhale the water and let go of life"... silence the voices with the spirit of a survivor.  Call upon the Lord... your constant help in every situation.  There is no loss that can destroy you, if you refuse to be destroyed.  No evil can take your dreams away if you stand firm and deny it's right to bring you down.  Stand strong... live your life, the life you want, the life you choose.

Okay... I'm getting off my little soapbox.  Here's a bit of Maura singing Trouble In The Fields!  The link will take you to YouTube to listen to it.  Be sure to pause my Playlist so you're not hearing two songs at once...