Regaining a Sense of Wonder

I wrote the following comment in response to a question on the Grow Me a Story Blog post, From Lamenting to Lauding.

"This time of year I tend to lean toward the lamenting, always feeling the absense of loved ones passed on or those I don't get to see very often. The morning pages have been very helpful, not just in sowing seeds for growth in creativity but as an outlet for examining feelings. It's a very healing activity. The 90 Days of Autumn Awareness has been wonderful in keeping me looking at what is around me and appreciating what I am observing. Little things like homemade chili, are normally not celebrated. As I focus on these small things, I find a new sense of wonder about my everyday world."

It is good to find things in life to celebrate, to regain our sense of wonder about the world and to appreciate the world around us.

Welcome November!

Since my September 1st post, life has been a whirlwind. My sister helped her partner drive their belongings to their new home in Oregon. She left him and their kitty there, and flew back to finish out her job and clear the apartment. She spent the last couple weeks in our home. Then before out flying to start her new life in Oregon, we went through a lot of her stuff that didn't make the trip, she helped me organize my front room and I decided what to keep and what should now go, we held a big yard sale which did really well, then we filled boxes of leftover items to be donated. It was fun having her here. We had a lot of late night talks, a lot of laughter, and a few tears. It was a special time. I plan to visit them next spring or summer, God willing.

I've continued doing my morning journal writing for the Grow Me A Story class. It's called Sowing Seeds. I just put down whatever comes to mind. It's a great exercise to clear the mind and to jot down creative ideas. I'm posting daily on Instagram as part of a 90 Days of Autumn Awareness activity. It's been challenging and fun! I'm working on setting some weekly writing goals, which will include posting more often on this blog. Until then...

Welcome September!

I am ready for September. This has been a busy and very hot summer, in fact the heat wave is continuing into this new month for at least the next week. I'll have to keep dreaming of those cooler days. I'm excited about changes that are coming up. My sister's move to Oregon. My continuing classes with Grow Me A Story. Getting out into the community more after very little of that in the past 3 years. It's late, so I must cut this short but wanted to get something posted on this first day of September. Life holds a lot of promise right now. I look forward to seeing what the coming weeks will bring!

Sunflowers - Free Image from Pixabay

Where Have I Been?

Life got messy again. Between the yard sale, a family member moving away soon, major changes at my church which I still can't attend in person, hitting a roadblock with my writing... it's all been a bit too much.

I made my third call this week to people I love who now have dementia. Two of the calls were today. Mary W. last Thursday. She remembered me, or seemed to, but little else. I'm still glad I made the call. Paul's Aunt Beth was today. She didn't know me at all. I still chatted a bit and told her I loved her. She and I have spent hours on the phone the past few years, talking art, writing, family, politics. So much in common and so much shared laughter. 

The last call was to my Uncle Tom. He knew me but was living in an earlier time in his life. We were able to talk about his motorcycle and his cats. He misses having pets where he's at. It's hard not to cry. You don't lose the person, but you lose a treasure trove of memories you shared. He was the last person I know who remembered my great grandparents, my grandparents, and my mom's childhood. I still had so many more questions to ask. Below is a photo of my uncle and his two sisters who have both passed on. He's the last of his siblings. The last who would have known their childhood stories.

Tom, Patsy, and Leah

Life is fleeting. When you're busy living it, you sometimes forget to savor it. To see and hear and absorb the stories of family members. I'm going to make an effort to be more present when I am with loved ones. To enjoy the moments and the making of memories. 

© 17AUG2022 ajjahner

July Activites

July has been a busy month so far. It occurred to me, I completely dropped the ball on my June Prompts so I went to take a look at the ones I hadn't used. I picked the following, for June 30th, to do today.

Describe an activity that reminds you of your childhood summers.

My childhood summers were filled with so many activities, but one I loved back then and still love today was shopping at yard sales. There was something exciting about piling into mom's car, heading down the road watching for signs, and quickly pulling into a parking spot. We all had some spending money and would begin searching the tables for a special treasure to take home. You never knew what you would find. A new book, a pretty doll, a board game, a cassette tape. Sometimes I'd find a new piece of clothing. Well, new to me and that was fun! I remember getting a Beatles cassette and mom discovering a song that was not appropriate, so she made me tape over that section with something else. I still get the same feeling of excitement when I spot a yard sale sign. 

So, that's my take on the June 30th prompt. It was written in 5 minutes without editing. I'm not even allowing myself the luxury of checking for spelling and punctuation errors. So there it is, though I really wanted to change those last two lines. They just didn't read well to me. That's part of the challenge, to just write.

This particular prompt fit with my most recent activity. We got our yard sale behind us and had a lot of fun doing it. We sold a lot of small items. My sister brought over some magazines and comic books which surprisingly sold very well. I neglected to take photos of the sale, except for a few items.

Cherished Teddy, Hannah

Tooth Fairy Box

Angel Box

Vintage Magazines

The best part of having the sale was visiting with the variety of people who stopped to shop. Each person was on the hunt for treasures. Some browsed with nothing particular in mind, just enjoying the process of seeing what jumped out at them. Others were on the search for a specific type of item. I was asked for Pyrex, video games, and Pokemon cards for example. The day was warm, but a nice breeze kept us from feeling the heat too much. It was a fun way to spend a day!

A Quick Note

I just realized it's been 10 days since my last post. Life got a little hectic. I'm still trying to get some writing in most days. I'm also trying to get ready for a big yard sale in two weeks. More details on that later on. We have definitely moved into the beginning of summer heat so I'll be staying inside with the AC on most days. I'm hoping we'll get a nice mild day for the yard sale. Fingers crossed! Well, that's all for now. Be back soon!

Haiku Prompt and Other Stuff

 I decided to tackle another of the June prompts I missed.

9. Write a haiku about your life this week.

Cell phone message pings

Long lost sister has been found

Explosion of joy

This is a rough, unedited haiku but it gives a brief picture of the moment my youngest sister

found my message from 5 years ago on Facebook and decided to take a chance and contact me.

It was a moment of pure joy!

~ ~ ~

My youngest sister and I have not made definite plans to get together in person yet, but hope to do that sometime soon. Other things happening with me are as follows.

I'm increasing my exercises to regain more of my mobility, while trying to eat a more heart healthy diet. What I thought was working ended up being too high on carbs. Soooo... less protein and less carbs and less salt. Basically less of all the delightful foods I love. More fruits and veg and fiber, which I also enjoy, but changing my palette has not been easy. It is important though, so I will comply! 

I have vowed to tackle my hoarding problem. My home is not just full of "stuff" but is incredibly dusty. Two years of physical limitations did not help. My husband has been wonderful as caregiver, cook, chauffeur, gardener, shopper, taking care of all the laundry. He's done it all, so dusting is not a priority to him or to me, and my "stuff" has to be sorted by me. Nobody else can decide what things are important for me to keep and which are to go to new homes. I have to do that part of it.

I'm still taking a Zoom class through Grow Me A Story and it has been so helpful! I'm doing a lot more writing, and I am enjoying it. I've also done a couple of craft projects. I haven't fully utilized the "Creative Rendezvous" we're assigned to do each week. It's a 2 hour block of time to explore and create on your own. It's hard for me to plan those since I'm not driving yet, but soon! I'd like to take myself to a museum or an actual bookstore or a second hand shop. Then treat myself to a fancy coffee somewhere. When I do go on my rendezvous I'll be sure to write about it here. Well, that's enough for today. Hope you are all well and happy!

© 16JUN2022 ajjahner

Favorite Memory Prompt

I haven't been using the June writing prompts but decided to try another one today. Life has just been so busy, including reconnecting with a little sister I hadn't seen in over 30 years. It was amazing! I may share more about it at some future date, but what I will say today is I am beyond happy and feel so blessed!

Now to the prompt. These are written with a 5 minute timer and unedited. The point is to push myself to write a little bit each day when possible. I'm doing the June 8th one today. 

8. Describe a favorite memory of a summer evening. 

I'm in our yard, mid 1960's. It's dusk and grandma is sitting in one of the lawn chairs. Grandpa points out the moonflowers. They are opening up! It's a magical sight to see the yellow blooms slowly unfolding into full bloom as the warm evening gets darker. As I look past them, across the gravel drive and the grapevines growing over the metal double loop fence, I can see the neighbors white house and big red barn in the distance. To the west the mountains look blue in the darkening sky. The fresh summer smells drift in on the warm breeze. Our old calico mama cat is tracking one of the giant moths that are attracted to the moonflowers. My sister and I watch it all with delight.

© 15JUN2022 ajjahner

The Scent of June

The prompt for June 4th was "Describe the scent of June" so here is what I came up with in the allotted 5 minutes:

The scent of June. That phrase evokes so many memories. Early summer with it's warm breezes brings  many scents. Fresh laundry dried on the line and the smell of warm cotton sheets. Freshly mown grass. I love that smell! Some days there is rain, like today. The occasional wafting odor of summer roses and other flowers. Burgers, chicken, or hot dogs cooking over an outdoor grill. Watermelon slices, ripe and juicy and ready to eat. There is a smell I remember from the beach at Lucky Peak. Warm sand, the water, the assortment of picnic foods, sunscreen, and just a hint of sage brush and perhaps pine blowing in on the hot breezes. All the scents of early summer.

~ ~ ~

It's a short paragraph. Again, I had a little trouble pulling my thoughts together on this one. I am also typing from my handwritten, unedited version, so it's a bit rough. 

I may skip a couple of the prompts, but will come back with one or two tomorrow. That's it for today!

#growmeastory

© 08JUN2022 ajjahner

Farmer's Market

June 3rd Prompt - 

Imagine your ideal reader is at a farmer's market. What does she buy, and why?

Farmer's Market Photo from Pixabay

I imagine my readers would go for the same type of things I enjoy. All the fresh produce, green beans, onions, tomatoes, strawberries, blueberries, corn, or whatever is in season at the moment. They would also take a look at any local arts and crafts. Maybe buy a handpainted sign for their home or an original painting. Home canned fruits or jams. Once they had browsed through the selection of produce and other items for sale and made their purchases, they would indulge in a local tamale, sandwich, or other street food for their lunch. I like to believe my readers would enjoy giving back to local farmers and artists and giving their support to small businesses. 

~ ~ ~

I hope you're enjoying my responses to my daily prompts. Some are more difficult for me to write about than others. Today was one of those. It was odd to try to get into my reader's mind. It's easier to get into an imaginary character's mind for some reason. It's also been several years since I was actually able to visit a farmer's market. I found myself wondering if they are the same as they used to be. It was always a welcoming, friendly way to shop. One of these days I may have to get myself out of the house and visit one again. 

#growmeastory

© 03JUN2022 ajjahner

The Beach

June 2nd Prompt - Write about a time you visitied the beach.

Beach picture from Pixabay

Though I had seen the ocean on a couple of occasions, my first time to actually go down to the beach was on our honeymoon. We stayed at a hotel overlooking the beach in Lincoln City, Oregon. Our room had sliding glass doors with a view of the ocean. They opened up to a short flight of steps leading down and you were right on the sandy beach. Even though it was July, the air was cold enough for a light sweater or wind breaker. I remember walking along looking for seashells and pretty rocks. I didn't find too many shells, but I picked up a couple rocks for my collection. It was nice walking beside the ocean with my new husband, my love. It was fun seeing sandpipers running along the beach. We took off our shoes and walked in the very cold water. The sights, the smell of the fresh air, the sound of the waves, and the smile on my new husband's face are some of my happiest memories. 

#growmeastory

© 02JUN2022 ajjahner

It's June!

June has arrived, sunny and beautiful! With it a new list of prompts from Grow Me A Story. I'll add my first one below but first I want to share a bit. This class I've been taking has been so helpful in breaking down some roadblocks I had about my writing. In addition to the daily writing exercises, I've been writing on this blog a little more faithfully, I've written a couple of short stories and a poem, and I finally picked up the draft pages of a book I started years ago and began the process of dusting them off. Yesterday I spent a couple hours reading about half the pages I'd written. I made a few edits. I also added notes for information I need to add to the book as I begin working on it again. I have a long way to go, but I feel confident that this is a book I want to complete, and I'm excited to get back to work on it.

Now for the first June Prompt:

Photos from Pixabay

June 1 Prompt - Summer

Summer is my least favorite season because of the heat, but I do have wonderful memories of happy summer days. Random thoughts like waking early and the dew is still on the grass. A world of flowers in bloom. Walking barefoot. In the grass it's cool and tickly, in the gravel it hurts a bit and is warm. Trips to Lucky Peak when I was a kid. Watermelon. Fresh strawberries. Hot dogs cooked on a grill. Coca-Cola. Snow cones. Ice cream cones. Warm sun beating down and feeling so good on my skin. Shorts and halter tops. Children running through sprinklers. Baseball in the back yard. Hide and seek. Summer days gone by. So many memories!

#growmeastory

© 01JUN2022 ajjahner

May Prompts #6, Final Prompts

It's hard to believe we are already at the end of May. I finished the rest of my prompts, so before the calendar turns to June, here they are!

27. What would eliminate the insecurity you named yesterday?

I think the only way to elimininate that is to continue to write. To trust myself. Get the words down and believe in my ability to tell a story with compassion, with truth, and everything else will fall into place. The spelling and grammar should not even play a part in the beginning process of getting words on paper. That is for much later, for an editor or even my own editing once I have the story written down. To break the bonds of insecurity, I have to keep pushing myself forward and possibly right off that scary high dive, plunging deeply into the unknown. That means I must simply keep writing it all down. Trust the process. Trust myself. Put my thoughts and words on paper. Write!

28. What makes you feel confident as a writer?

The main thing is feeling like I have a lot of stories to share. There are just so many ideas in my head. I've also received a lot of positive feedback over the years, starting as early as High School, then later as I wrote my blog, wrote a church newsletter, and shared parts of my book ideas and short stories with friends who were also writers. So, not just family, though there's nothing wrong with that either. Many of my family are avid reads and wouldn't hesitate at telling me if they didn't like it. I know I have the skills. I know I have the stories. It's just a matter of getting down to business and getting the work done. That is the hard part for me.

29. What did you learn this month?

I learned how much more is tucked away in my memory that I haven't even begun to access. Through the daily May Prompts, I've explored some new ideas and thoughts. It's helped me to focus in on my writing. Even doing them in blocks, as I did, rather than each day was still helpful. I learned that taking a break doesn't need to mean failure or giving up. It's a break! Come right back and the break has served it's purpose. Never quit just because you hit a roadblock. Daily writing really helps with creativity, so I want to contiue that as faithfully as I am able. I learned I have much to share and that I am able to get the work done if I put my mind to it.

30. Describe a food that reminds you of summer.

This is not your usual summer food but for me it's a fresh Gooseberry Pie! Growing up, picking gooseberries was part of our early summer tasks. Grandpa would usually pick them, though I helped many times, then we'd sit outside under the shade of our big oak tree and pluck the blossoms off each berry. This had to be done carefully and meticulously, to Grandma's standards! No brown bit of blossom must be left and no breaking of the berries. While we plucked the berries, Grandma would tell stories or sing. We'd join in the singing, in harmony like she'd taught us. At the end, she'd make that fresh Gooseberry Pie with part of the berries. The rest would go into the freezer. She'd serve us all a warm slice with a scoop of vanilla ice cream that gently melted over the delicious pie. Heaven!

31. Name a time when planning ahead paid off and why.

Wow, this takes some thought. Since I'm home almost 100% of the time, I do very little planning ahead. I mostly fly by the seat of my big ol' pants! Yes, you can laugh! I am! I guess one thing I put a lot of planning into was our vacation to the Oregon Coast a few years back. Plannng ahead meant best locations to stay, better prices, etc. It was a wonderful time and all within my budget. I've also done some planning ahead on my book. The first and last pages are written. I have titles and an outline for each chapter. Many chapters have been partially written. It hasn't paid off yet, but the outline is helping me organize the story and make progress on it.

#growmeastory

© 31MAY2022 ajjahner

May Prompts #5

Here are the next few prompts. I'm still not caught up, but working on it. So many things to do!

23. Write a letter to your 10-year-old self on the last day of school before summer break.

Dear Jo, 

This is going to be one of the best summers ever! Take it all in. Hold it! Remember it! After the loss of your little brother, there will be an extra effort by the adults in your life. Enjoy the love and attention. It's not that they love you differently or more than before, it's just that they realize how fleeting life is. You are headed to California with your grandparents and your little sister, leaving school early! That means Disneyland, Knotts Berry Farm, Sea World. You get to see the ocean! Ask them to take lots of pictures of you and your sis. You will wish they had. Soak in all the sights at Disneyland. The magic, the colors, the sounds. Hear the laughter of your grandparents, your sis, the Thorntons, and remember. Tuck it all away in your heart and memory as the treasure it is! Live fully! Have fun! 

With love, your much older self, Anita Jo

24. Describe the scene outside your window.

As I glanced out my sliding doors, I see so much green from all the rain we've been blessed with this spring. Today is overcast and colder. The wind is gently blowing the leaves of the Maple tree and the Hollyhocks which are now about 3 feet high. The two potted geraniums are in full bloom. Red and so pretty! Two of the rose bushes on the berm now have blossoms, the red one and the pink one. There are birds at the feeders. Doves in the big one, staying under the cover in case of more rain. The rhubarb has gone crazy! It is so tall and thick and takes command of 1/3 of our garden spot. I am loving the rain, the clouds, and all the blooms and the green! It's a perfect afternoon for writing and reading.

25. Use the word "progress" as your prompt today.

Progress. To move forward. To accomplish a goal. I can feel I've made progress in some areas in the past few months. Much of it due to this class on The Artist's Way. I have written, by hand, three pages most days. I've done many of the book tasks. I've joined in the Zoom classes even on days I wanted to just hide quietly in a book or a movie. That is real progress for me! I tend to avoid things that make me uncomfortable, so to push myself into this new technology (new to me) and share with my instructors and classmates is true progress. I have also made advances in my writing and feel it has opened up my mind to what more I can accomplish. Another area is I've started taking better care of my health with diet changes and exercise. This is all progress for me.

26. What makes you feel insecure in your writing, and why?

I'd like to think I wasn't insecure in my writing but history shines a glaring light on that. I obsess about whether or not I am using proper English, spelling, and puctuation. I worry excessively about how my words will be interpreted. Will I offend anyone? Will they find my writing boring or lacking in substance? If it's a blog post, I worry that my words will be hard to "hear" and that my writing voice might reflect snarkiness when I intended to just be thoughtful and honest. In considering a book, I worry it won't entertain or that I won't be making the point I'm going for. If there are insecurities about writing, I'm sure I have all of them. 

#growmeastory 

© 29MAY2022 ajjahner

May Prompts #4

 And it continues... I am almost caught up on prompts. 

17. How has your writing life evolved in the past three months?

I have become more desciplined in the writing of morning pages, also called the sowing seeds of creativity. I have finally pulled out my book, dormant since 2013, and started to read through what I had and making notes for changes and additional story ideas. I have found a new confidence in my writing ideas and abilities. I have spent time on a few creative writing projects and prompts. I have done a few more blog posts. I feel my writing is moving in a positive direction, one that will bring fruit. One that will take me to my next level of writing. I credit this to the class on The Artist's Way which I signed up for through Grow Me a Story.

18. Write about a time when a wise woman made a difference in your life.

I can't bring one specific moment to mind. My mother and my grandmother both imparted so much wisdom and faith to me in very different ways. They are the women I would go to when I needed counsel, along with a couple of dear friends who were also will to listen and give thoughtful, compassionate advice. I don't choose to go into detail on any of this. I will say that finding a wise person who will listen with their heart, as well as their ears, and will thoughtfully speak from their heart is a priceless treasure. be they woman or man.

19. What is your favorite flower that blooms in May? Why?

I get excited by any flowers that bloom in May. Here in the Treasure Valley that can change from year to year depending on the changeable Idaho weather. Most Hyacinths and Tulips have bloomed and are gone by early May, as well as the Forsythia. My favorite of all the flowers is the Lilac and this year it is still in bloom! I love the purple color. I love the heady fragrance. The look of the delicate little blossons. They also remind me of my grandpa. He loved them too! He pruned our bushes into small trees and they were beautiful! I have a photo of him standing next to his last Lilac "tree". It was as tall as he was, and so beautiful. Lilacs are the flowers of happy memories and the early sign of a beautiful summer season to come.

20. Use the word "garden" as your prompt today.

Garden. I see grandpa out weeding, pruning, watering, harvesting. He was the gardener, as was his father. I am not a gardener. I can barely keep my houseplants alive. I do appreciate a lovely garden though. I have memories of rose gardens in parks in Caldwell, Nampa, and Boise, Idaho. My husband and I visited a rose garden on our honeymoon in Portland, Oregon. We also visited the Japanese garden while there. It was so serene and peaceful. I love a garden that is green and simple, with water features, rocks, sand, and statues. I also love a garden that is an explosion of color. It's like a party for the senses with all the different fragrances and the varying shapes and colors of the blossoms.

21. What was the last article or book you read that inspired you? Why was it inspiring?

Saturday, which happened to be the 21st, my sister brought me a very rough, beat up copy of the Amplified Bible with both Old and New Testaments. It had been gifted to her by our grandma after grandpa had passed away. She has now gifted it to me. It was originally given to our grandpa by his parents in 1965. I sat and thumbed through it, reading highlighted passages. It was inspiring, not just because of what the scriptures said, but because it had been held and marked and cherished by my grandpa. It is the second Bible of his I am privileged to own. Well loved books like this one are an inspiration. Something to treasure and to reread again and again.

22. What color caught your eye today, and why?

Blue. It started with noticing the beautiful blue sky when I opened the front door to get my Sunday paper. Blue is the color I chose for 2022. I was also wearing a blue Star Wars t-shirt. As I sat sipping my morning coffee, I realized how much blue is already in my home. A blue curtain at the kitchen window. A blue and white quilt hanging over our sliding glass doors. Different shades of blue from cobalt to a seafoam blue green. Little dog salt and pepper shakers; book covers like Harry Potter, a Vera mystery, and more; a dark blue Old Navy metal cup I use as a pencil and pen holder; the blue pen I an writing with. Blue all around, and more to come as it's my current favorite color!

#growmeastory

© 23MAY2022 ajjahner

May Prompts #3

I'm really lagging behind on this challenge. Just a reminder, these are part of a challenge for the class I'm taking though Grow Me A Story. You take the prompt, set a 5 minute timer, and just write. These are the results. Sorry for the very long post. That's what happens when you procrastinate.

13.What is your favorite book set in summer and why?

First of all I had to define for myself "book set" read in the summer or a book "set" in the summer season. Two very different things. I decided to go with book sets. That said, this will be a list of some favorites because I can't seem to chose just one set. I also found myself caught between the word set and series. A set indicates a smaller collection in my mind. Here are a few favorites I highly recommend for both younger and older readers and everyone in between:

Chronicles of Narnia, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, the Anne of Green Gables set, the Mary Poppins books, the Harry Potter series, the Miss Marple mystery series (my personal favorite Agatha Christie books though Poirot and the rest are very good too), the Cat Who mysteries, Louise Penny's Inspector Gamache series, Deborah Crombie's Duncan Kincaid and Jemma James mysteries, the James Herriot All Creatures Great and Small book series. These are many of my favorites, but not all. These are books I would read again and again. Curl up in a lounge chair in your back yard or on a beach, cool beverage in hand, and enjoy some great summer reading!

14.Finish this sentence: I wish my readers knew that . . .

My goal in writing is to reach the heart. To touch peoples lives, to open then up to new ideas, and to share my thoughts on certain isues. In a book I would want the story to take them on a journey where they would see people who are just like themselves, but see them in a new way, and to get to know people who are very different than themselves too, perhaps gaining a new level of acceptance and love for them, even forgiveness if needed. I hope to show that even the ugliest situation can be turned. That the most vile people deserve a chance for forgiveness if they want it. That we are all deserving of that 2nd, 3rd, or 500th chance to begin again. To start anew. Forgiveness and love are two of the goals in my writing.

15.Use the word "possibility" as your prompt today.

Possibility. A thing to look forward to. Hope. Expectation. A dream or idea that has the potential of coming true. Not fantasy. An actual possibility. A thing that can happen! The word is filled with hope. I have the possibility of improving my health, of completing my book, of getting published. There are also possiblities for travel in my future. For accomplishing some long awaited home improvements. Possibility is a word without fear for me. Though there could be the chance of bad things ahead, I only see it as a positive. Good things out there just waiting to be realized and enjoyed!

16. Describe a routine that works well for you.

Another hard one. I tend to buck against routine, although I start most days very much the same. Upon waking I take my morning meds, wash up or shower, get dressed, say my morning prayers, and most days I now write my morning pages aka sowing seeds for Grow Me a Story. Somewhere before, during, or after, I make my 1st cup of coffee for the day. That's about it for routine other than prayers at bedtime and making sure I water my houseplants on the weekend. I do fit in my physical therapy exercises but at no particular time. I'm more of a free spirit drifting my way through my days. I might benefit from adding more routine to my days. Something to consider.

#growmeastory

© 22MAY2022 ajjahner

More May Writing Prompts

Writing went on the back burner while I took some much needed time to rest and recuperate. I worked on a couple more of the May writing prompts. Catching up, but not quite there yet. Just a reminder, these are from my handwritten notes. You take the prompt, set a 5 minute timer, and just write. These are the results.

May 9. Write about a memory of your favorite childhood teacher.

Mrs. Stewart was my 7th grade Social Studies teacher and also my English teacher. My favorite class with her was English. We did all the practical class activities, but the most wonderful thing she did was to introduce me to books I had never thought of reading. One of those was The Long Walk by Slavomir Rawicz. This was a book about an escape from a prision camp just after World War II. Mrs. Stewart decided that even as 7th graders we needed a story. Our class was right after lunch so for the first few minutes of class she read to us. This story was so emotional that more than once she had tears start rolling down her cheeks. She would put the book mark in and say "We'll have to come back to this tomorrow" much to our dismay and loud protestations. Mrs. Stewart opened my eyes to new, different, and often important books. I loved her!

May 10. Use the word "sunshine" as your prompt today.

"Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy. Sunshine in my eyes can make me cry. 

Sunshine on the water looks so lovely. Sunshine almost always makes me high."

This John Denver song came immediately to mind. It's exactly how I feel about sunshine. It brings happiness, life, warmth, and can also make me cry.  Memories of sunny days gone by. I love the way warm sun feels on my skin. How it cheers me after a storm has passed. It brings to mind swingsets, backyard baseball, ready or not, beaches, sand, grass, rocks. All the things of play and of nature that you see out on a sunny day. Sunshine can be healing for the spirit.

11.What is something you want?

I want my home back. I live in a house I have filled with clutter. Stuff. When there is too much stuff, it loses it's significance. It becomes overwhelming, exhausting. I want my home to be organized and welcoming. A place for family and for the photos and treasures I cherish the most. A place where friends could come in and feel comfortable and welcomed. The hard part is figuring out how to make it a reality. How to separate myself from things that hold emotional connections but now are really no longer needed to keep those memories alive. It's  process. A difficult one, but I'm ready to undertake it. I want my home back! I will have it!

12.What is something you need?

There are so many things I need or could use, but the most important thing right now is my health. I need to be well enough to do the things I enjoy and the things that need done. Organizing my home, writing my book, working on Ancestry, dates with my husband, outings with friends. In order to do any of these I need to feel good. Poor health is robbing me of joy! It has robbed me of attending weddings, showers, funerals, birthdays. It has kept me from the things I love most like reseaching ancestors, writing a book on my family history, finishing the book on The Dollhouse. I need to work on my health! I need to reclaim it!

#growmeastory

© 19MAY2022 ajjahner

May Writing Prompts

The course I am taking through Grow Me A Story has given a list of writing prompts for the month of May. I finally got around to getting some of them done. These are just thoughts on the prompt, written in 5 minutes. You take the prompt for the day, set a timer, and just write whatever comes to mind. Here are the first few I've done. These are typed just as I wrote them, without editing.

May 1. Use the word "bloom" as your prompt today.

The word bloom makes me think of my mom. One of her favorite sayings was "Bloom where you are planted". Easier said than done sometimes. I'm currently in a rocky place. To bloom seems difficult, but it is not impossible. If roots are planted deeply enough, then water and nourishment will be found, and as they are found, I will flourish and eventually blooms will appear. Bloom is a word of hope. Of coming to fruition. Of life and of beauty. As I look out into my yard, I see all the beautiful blooms that came from plants and trees which had lain dormant during the long winter months. Then came the season to bloom, to shine! That time is coming for me, as a writer and as a person.

May 2. Write about a time you went on a picnic.

Picnics bring to mind my mom. We went on a lot of picnics when I was young. To the parks, to the hills, to Lucky Peak or Robie Creek. I remember one picnic when I was about 6 years old. It was at Lucky Peak. Mom spread a blanket over the hot sand, near the water. We had hot dogs on white bread. The ketchup oozed through the thin Wonder Bread, but the hot dogs were delicious! We had glass bottles of soda, bags of chips, and I think there was watermelon. Mom sat in her cutoffs and button-up shirt tied at her waist, dark sun glasses. We played in the sand and in the water! It was a perfect day!

May 3. Imagine your perfect summer day and describe it using your senses.

Summer is not my favorite season, but there have been some wonderful summer days. My perfect summer day would be sunny, but not too hot. About 68 to 72 degrees, a slight breeze keeping the air moving. The scent of roses and other summer flowers in the air. It would be walking barefoot in the soft grass or on a beach. It would be a trip to the park with a picnic lunch and then a visit to the zoo. It would be stopping for an icee, a snow cone, or an ice cream cone. It would be taking the slow way home and going off plan to drive wherever the road takes me, radio playing, hair blowing in the wind from my open window. All of these or any one of these!

May 4. Describe your plan for your summer writing.

I don't really have a plan. I've been advised to just write. To let words flow onto paper. To just get something written down. That is what I plan to do. I also plan to put more family stories onto "paper". To get the memories down for my sons to have to to enjoy. I also plan to revisit the books I started. To read them again. To add some content to them. To share them with someone who will look at them with fresh eyes. To accept criticism. To allow myself the time and the commitment to just write freely and without restricting my thoughts. Write. Write. Write. That is my only plan.

May 5. Use the word "growth" as your prompt today.

Growth. To change. To stretch. To bloom. To reach a new stature or a new place. To achieve a new goal. I am pushing to achieve new growth in my writing this year. Working through the class and the prompts from Grow Me A Story. It has enlarged my borders. It has created the "fertile ground" for my growth to begin to take off. I can feel the changes in how I am approaching not just writing, but in other areas of my life. Growth means health. When we're not growing, we are not really living. We are stagnant. Growth requires nourishment, fresh air, sunshine, and care. That's what growth in my creative life requires.

May 6. Describe the best and worst things that happened this week.

This one is hard. I suppose the worst thing is this miserable cough that keeps hanging on. Being sick has kept me from doing things around the house I wanted to get done. It has kept me from my Morning Pages and other creative work. The best thing is I finally saw my doctor. Started on antibiotics and meds and now am feeling better. I'm back to my Morning Pages. I've had a surge of creative energy just this morning. We've also had more rain, my lilacs are beginning to bloom. There is always good alongside any bad. Look for the good in life. It is there for the taking.

May 7. Identify an obstacle to enjoying your summer. What can you do about it?

I am the obstacle. My cough, my weakness, my overall poor health. My fear of leaving my house and the fear of having anyone visit me because of all the clutter. My dislike of summer heat and how it makes me feel. I can work to improve my health. Follow doctor's orders. Keep exercising and increasing my strength levels. Start leaving the comfort of my house a little at a time, beginning with small outings. Get my house in order so I won't feel shame when a friend comes by. And, work on ignoring my own mess and enjoying the fact that there is a wonderful friend here to visit with me in my own home. Lose the personal judgement I put on myself!

8.Describe a favorite memory of your mother or a mother figure from your childhood.

My mother. There are so many memories to choose from. The same with my grandma, the mother who raised me. For mom it's yard sales, long drives, picking asparagus from the side of the road, listening to the radio, spur of the moment ideas like knocking down her old fence with the help of her Volkwagen Bug. Laughter! For grandma it's singing and learning to harmonize. Hanging laundry together. Hearing her pray while she was cleaning or just walking through the house. Playing checkers and Scrabble. Long walks up the field. Hearing her yodal! Hearing her laughter. Feeling her love. Feeling their love! Having the blessing of 2 mothers in my life. Both who loved me so deeply and so well! I have been blessed!

#growmeastory

© 09MAY2022 ajjahner

What I've Been Up To

Since my last post, life has been busy. There has been some sickness, some loss, and some wonderful things. I'm going to share about the wonderful today!

The reel to reel recoder my sis got has enabled her to save many old recordings. Then I found a way to convert my old cassette tapes. I found my grandpa preaching, my mom and my other grandpa telling family stories, a lot of singing including a duet my brother sang in high school. He's been gone from this life for many years, so there was some ugly crying when I heard his voice coming from that old tape!

I completed the first session of the Grow Me a Story class and we are now onto the second session. I'm enjoying it so much! It is really getting the reluctant artist/writer in me to come out of my self imposed seclusion. Life feels very good right now. Thank you for stopping by. Please leave a comment if you enjoy reading my little blog.

Small Miracles...

Just a short post. This has been quite a week leading up to my mom's birthday. I've had so many wonderful memories of her. A little project that got put on the back burner, first by me and then by my sis, was to find a reel to reel player to listen to mom's old tapes. Two days ago, my sister's partner surprised her with an old portable reel to reel player. The first tape she listened to had mom learning the guitar and singing one of our dad's favorite songs to sing, Keys to the Kingdom. Needless to say, we both did some crying and some laughing too. It's the small miracles that make life so amazing!

Pushing Myself

I hit a roadblock last week. Didn't feel great, so instead of doing my classwork or any creative projects, I spent a few days laying back in my recliner watching television. I felt a little guilty about not doing the work, but sometimes a bit of self care is required.  I indulged in naps, cups of hot tea, caught up on some TV series, and listened to an audiobook. My husband kept checking on me to make sure I had whatever I needed. He is a great guy! I know I'm blessed to have him in my life.

Yesterday I got back to writing my Morning Pages. It felt good! I'm surprised how much I missed it. I also attended the ZOOM class meeting this morning. I am really enjoying them! For those who missed an earlier post, the class is through Grow Me A Story and has been so helpful. 

As much as self care is important to overall well being, so is pushing myself. It's learning to find the balance between the two. I am often surprised at how quickly a goal is reached when I just sit down and focus on it, for even a short time. This week I'll be pushing myself to complete the class reading and tasks, work on creative projects, and also schedule a Creative Rendevous. I'll let you know how it all goes!

Refresh, Dream, Imagine

Those are just some of the words on a vision board I created. It was a recent project for one of the Grow Me A Story assignments. I had so much fun creating it. One afternoon, while listening to a Hallmark Mystery, I took a stack of 10 magazines and tore out images that spoke to me. The next afternoon, as a Creative Rendevous, I found Carole King's complete Tapestry album on YouTube and listened to it while creating my vision board. I clipped, trimmed, arranged, and glued, keeping the best and discarding a few. It was a wonderful way to spend some creative time for myself. It also made me think about how I see myself, what my dreams and goals are, and where I plan to go from here.

Missing from the vision board are images directly relating to writing or publishing. Part of this process is discovering where I want to go with that particular dream, or if I still wish to pursue it. Life brings a lot of changes, redirection, paths we didn't plan on taking, and once in a while it brings us back to an old dream. I am definitely exploring who I could be as a writer.

What is reflected on the vision board is my desire for an organized, comfortable home; a focus on healthy eating and good health, which hopefully means I will be able to drive again this year; words to spark my creative self, like imagine and dream; finding my bliss, my joy in living; integrating more fun into my life by returning to things I love like going to tag sales and listening to music; the squares of blue symbolize my color for this year and the blue yarn is a nod to the two short stories I wrote for the class; Cyndi Lauper and Nina Garcia symbolize my love for fashion, design, independence, and creativity. That is a brief explanation of my vision board, which you can see below, though much of it goes deeper. Something to explore on another day perhaps.

2022 Vision Board

I do intend to be writing more faithfully on this blog, and I am excited to see where this year takes me! 

© 02MAR2022 ajjahner

Grow Me a Story

Hello again! I'm attempting to write a little more faithfully on this blog. This morning I want to share my latest adventure. Well, it's an adventure for me anyway. I signed up for a one year membership with Grow Me a Story. It has been amazing for me so far! I'll admit, I had some doubts going in. The two people running it are very special to me, my sweet cousin Paul and his lovely wife Carol, who also happens to be a dear friend of mine. My doubts were not in their ability to facilitate a business venture, which purpose is to help people live a more creative life. My doubts were in my ability to commit to the process. I am doing so much better than I thought I would! I've been doing the reading and the assignments, writing my morning pages every day, participating in most of the ZOOM classes, and listening to the weekly podcast. It's renewed an interest in writing as well as a desire to explore other areas of creativity. I will probably share more as the year progresses. In the meantime, I'm learning more about myself and having fun in the process!

Dealing With Loss...

Here is another draft from 2019. I find it is still relevant, as several friends have been dealing with loss in recent months. There are also times when grief over the loss of a parent, other family member, or dear friend is triggered once again, even when it was years ago. The pain resurfaces and we feel it all over again. At those times, these same suggestions would be helpful to remember.

Originally Written: July 15, 2019 3:05 PM 

I wrote this in a comment to an acquaintance, who recently lost her father, in answer to her question, "What do you do to take care of yourself, to emotionally heal, during your roughest times?"

"I don't really have anything new to add to all these great suggestions. During loss, I kept pushing myself through the necessary tasks of life. I believe that was helpful, but it was also very important to have moments of allowing the grief to flow out of me through tears and time to get lost in the memories. I wrote about my feelings, I searched through photos and videos, I donated to charities in remembrance, I gave myself permission to take time to sit quietly and just let the feelings wash through me.

My belief is our loved ones are very present with us for a time, if we allow ourselves to connect. Even if a person doesn't believe in spirit connection, there is much to be said for the power of memory. Close your eyes and feel the memory of their smile, hugs, voice, the very essence of who they were to you. One of my favorite suggestions, in the earlier comments, is creating a special memory place in your Secret Garden. A corner for your dad, a place to sit and remember. Fill it with the joyful memories. Fill it with color. Let the tears release your pain, until they become tears of joy and laughter."

When Life Gets Complicated...

I'm sharing another draft post. This one was written on May 22, 2018 at 2:01 AM. I still find myself awake in the wee hours of the morning, mulling over the issues and concerns of life. When I read this old draft, I was struck by the fact that I'm still working on these things. Yes, I have gotten stronger. I have found a clearer direction in many aspects of life, but there is still room for improvement. I hope reading this might encourage or inspire you. This is what I wrote back in 2018.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

When things in my life get complicated, and the news of the world gets overwhelming, I recognize I need a place to retreat to. Sharing what's happening with my family or my health issues comes too easily at times. It's not the worst thing to share our pain or frustrations with others to get their feedback and support. We need one another. It has simply become clear to me, I need to step back and find my center again. That's what I've been doing in my absences from writing and blogging. Searching for my center, for spirit and soul edification.

I'll be the first to admit, I've got miles to go. In my imagination, I believed by this stage of life I would be so confident, standing strong in my power. There are days I wonder when and where I got off track. The thing is, I've come to believe I am following the exact path I was intended to walk. Every step along the way, every painful or frustrating situation, has brought new insight with it. It's not always easy to see growth because it comes in stages and over time. Picture the oak and it's beginnings with just a small acorn. Over the passing years, stature increases and roots push deeper. We don't witness the daily changes, but one day we realize how strong that oak has become. How tall and proud and resilient.

My stature may not be that of a great oak, but my heart and soul are stronger today than ever before. Even when the journey seems rocky and difficult, we are experiencing growth and change.

© 03FEB2022 ajjahner

Missing Lyrics...

One more from my "Drafts" folder. That makes three today, so far. The original blog post was written February 9, 2018. My Uncle Burt is no longer with us, but reading this post again, I could hear him singing so clearly. I loved listening to my uncle sing! I hope you enjoy reading this old post:

While sorting through a box this morning, I found a scrap of paper with a note to myself from a few years back. I'd had a phone call from my Uncle Burt, asking if I had the lyrics to an old song he was trying to recall, or if I remembered them. He most likely remembered them himself long ago, but at the time I could only remember bits and pieces, which I wrote down. Every so often, I’d look at the note and try to remember, but couldn’t. Somehow that note ended up in a box of photos and ancestry notes.

Well, this morning I still couldn't remember, so I decided to google a line. The first try brought no results. I tried the other line I had, and there it was! Different title, different lyrics, but the right tune. The original song is called, When They Ring Those Golden Bells, and there are several YouTube versions by different artists, including Tennessee Ernie Ford, Andy Griffith, Mahalia Jackson, and even Natalie Merchant.

I'm not sure who had written our lyrics, but it was possible my grandmother. Anyway, some of them came back to me after I listened to the original tune. Here they are, as best I can remember:

There's a land that's like a river

Flowing, going on forever

We will reach that distant shore by faith's decree

Moving forward with each other

From one triumph to another

While the trumpet sounds with life

For you and me

Don't you hear the trumpet sounding

Rising, billowing resounding

Tis the call to rise above this troubled sea

Man's last enemy to banish

Sin and death from earth to vanquish

While the trumpet sounds with life

For you and me

(To the tune of When They Ring Those Golden Bells)

Considering Friendships...

Another small selection from my "Drafts" folder. I've decided to go ahead and publish it today. The original blog post was written November 16, 2014. Ironically, I was thinking about friendships just yesterday. The different types and those that come and go.  Here's what I wrote back in 2014:

I've been thinking of friendships that didn't pass the test of time. Somewhere along the way, we drifted away from one another. It's even true with some family members. Relationships take nurture and attention. Some are for a lifetime, like the steadfast, strong oak. Others are for a season, blooming beautifully but quickly gone. Yet, even those are remembered, and treasured, and often missed.

Procrastinating...

I found the following in my "Drafts" folder. I've decided to go ahead and publish it today. The original blog post was written May 14, 2013, and was supposed to have photos of the table, which I haven't found yet. About time it was published on Blogger.

Original Post:

Posting today is just another way of procrastinating.  I'm supposed to be cleaning and sorting, but I'm just now on my first cup of coffee and can't quite get myself motivated yet.

It was a productive weekend.  I think I mentioned that I'd given away my dining table and chairs.  I just wanted something different.  I was looking for a rustic farm table.  Something I wouldn't feel back about putting extra nicks in, while working on craft projects.  A couple weeks ago, a neighbor was on the end of a three day yard sale.  I kept looking out my window and seeing a table sitting there.  I thought it was being used to display the small stuff, but finally got my husband to walk over with me just before she closed up.  I got the table for $10.00!

We've been working on it.  PJ sanded down the top.  We tried one finish, which we both hated, and he sanded it again.  I'd been thinking about a "shabby" white finish, but while looking at stain colors from Minwax, I spotted a water based stain called "River Stone" which has a blue tone to it.  I had my vision!  PJ painted the table legs black, and roughed them up a bit.  I used the River Stone stain on the table top.  It was a process of applying, wiping off, sanding, reapplying, wiping off... When it had the rustic look I wanted, PJ applied three coats of a water based Polycrylic finish.  I love it!  It's exactly what I envisioned!  

Morning Pages...

Part of the assignment for the class I am taking, a study of The Artist's Way, is to write Morning Pages. This is 3 handwritten pages of Stream of Consciousness writing. Free writing of whatever pops into your mind. It can be anything at all from story ideas, to family issues, to the weather, what irritates you, what brings you joy. Anything and everything that runs through your mind. It's very theraputic. I did not think I'd be able to do it consistently, but right now I can't imagine not doing it.

I finally attended the Zoom class! It was less terrifying than I had imagined. I get such anxiety over things like that. I even shared a bit, so that was good. I was careful not to overshare as I can get too chatty. You can all probably surmise that from my blog posts in the past. I tend to ramble...

The experience of taking this class, combined with doing the assignments like the morning pages, is definitely breaking something open in me. It is sparking my creative desires again. Who knows where it will ultimately lead, all I know is I'm enjoying this journey!

January 2022, Still Here...

Hello again! I'm a little shocked that I only posted three times last year. It has been some crazy times for us since my bypass surgery in 2020, then my husband's retirement, and all happening during the first year of Covid. We're still hanging in. We had our vaccinations and boosters and still got Covid at our house. Husband tested positive and the rest of us got sick at the same time, so it's fairly certain that's what we had. The cough and tiredness lingers on, but we are so fortunate. Friends who were not vaccinated actually ended up in the hospital on ventilators. Friends and extended family lost loved ones, both young and old. Our state Covid numbers are still climbing. We live in the Northwest and were mentioned on national news tonight. I am so over all of this! Praying we're nearing the end of it!

The good news, I started following the blog, Grow Me A Story, and as a result I signed up for their classes. Full transparency, Paul and Carol Roberts are family. He's my cousin and she is one of my dearest friends. Carol is leading the group through the book The Artist's Way, and I'm learning so much. It's definitely got my creative soul inspired again. Paul is doing a weekly podcast which I am enjoying as well! This is my attempt to see if I can get back to writing. I had completely given up on it, but every once in a while I would wonder if I should give it another try. I'm not sure where my creative journey will take me. I'm considering dusting off my piano again. Poor thing hasn't been played in years. I'm also dabbling with a couple simple art projects. I'll let you all know how I'm progressing, and I'll try to make it more frequent than I did the past couple years. New beginnings! That's all for now. Take care, my friends, and God bless!